Uggghhhh the last few days…okay actually the last week has just felt very heavy. With all the political shit storms happening, the uncertainty about where we are headed and to top it off I have had some reactions or an outward physical sensitivity to something. I cannot put my finger exactly on what it is but coffee is suspect…

Through this frustrating period I have tried to maintain my most important routines. Every morning I clear the lymph system in the body and then do some twisting and jumping followed by breath work. And every time I close my eyes to do the breath work I can see some visions of mala necklaces that I have long been wanting to make.

While I have yet to learn how to do this I did take the steps to start looking at the beads I would like to use. There are also other steps that I need to look into and learn, like how to drill out hard stones or crystals. But one thing at a time. I am planning this out because I am hoping to visit a friend in the next few days and as I go on this little road trip I will make a stop or two at the bead shops instead of ordering online.

Ahhh okay but let’s get to the point. The point I guess is this – go in the direction that feels good. Do what inspires you and brings joy. While I have deeply felt these troubling times, and I switch from worry to looking ahead I realize that nothing is more important than THIS moment. Right here. Right now.

I may not know all the answers for myself like where I am going or how I am to get where I’d like to be. But I do know that I can only get there one day at a time and to TRULY get there means being ME. Letting my true self shine.

Be not afraid of growing slowly, be afraid of standing still.

~ Chinese Proverb

Essential Teachings

The success of our lives an our future depends on our motivation and determination or self confidence. Through difficult experiences, life sometimes becomes more meaningful. If you look at people who, from the beginning of their lives, have had everything, you may see that when small things happen they soon lose hope or grow irritated. Others have developed stronger mental attitudes as a result of their hardships.

~

I think the person who has had more experience of hardships can stand more firmly in the face of problems than the person who has never experienced suffering. From this angle then, some suffering can be a good lesson for life.

~ HIS HOLINESS THE DALAI LAMA

The last few days have been tough. There is a heaviness everywhere AND it was a full moon.

On one hand I could be disappointed in myself that I, yet again missed a few posts. I know I made a commitment to myself, however I also couldn’t force how some things might go and then further acknowledge the fact that sometimes there’s just nothing to say.

That’s how I felt these past few days…

Friday a huge police presence descended upon Ottawa and started moving people and blocking off streets. Horses were brought in and trampled people. There were snipers on rooftops. Every officer was dressed in full tactical gear, many even wearing helmets, eye protection or gas masks and ear protection. It was unbelievable to see. It wasn’t a good day.

Saturday was worse. I saw police use some type of gas on people as they pushed the crowd together. Trucks were towed away and the streets cleared. I saw one reporter get hit with something that was painful and felt like it was boring her skin. Police held their line all the while peaceful protestors continued to gather, sing O Canada, yell FREEDOM, and recite the oath that police officers took to them.

By Sunday morning there was very little left however police had now blocked many streets off and even people that live downtown Ottawa had difficulty leaving their buildings to take their dog for a walk and come back.

Police have not upheld their oaths and are now violating their oaths as well as our Charter of Rights.

It’s been a sad few days. I needed some time to think. There are no clear answers other than it is extremely important to not let fear paralyze me.

At any given moment you have the power to say: this is not how the story is going to end.

~ Christine Mason Miller

Excerpt from: STAR WARS THE JEDI MIND – Secrets from the Force for Balance and Peace

Letting go of SHOULD

• Notice the next time you use the word “should” whether you think or say it.
• Question the source of the should. Why do you think you should or shouldn’t have done something or behaved in a certain way? What can or can’t be done to change it?
• Make a regular practice of observing when you use “should.” Investigating why you use it will help you be more susceptible to learning, rather than being stuck in old ways of thinking.

Luke has many preconceived ideas about how the galaxy works by the time he arrives on Dagobah. Yoda repeatedly advises Luke to clear his mind and trust the Force. It doesn’t really click for Luke until he sees the impossible – Yoda lifting Luke’s X-wing fro the swamp – with his own eyes.

Minds constantly measure everything against how we think things should be. But what is our source of this condition of should? Why that and not something else? Having preconceived ideas can block us from absorbing new information.

You must unlearn, what you have learned.

~ Yoda

Everything happens the way it’s supposed to happen. How do we know this? Because this is how it IS happening or how it happened.

READ THAT AGAIN.

This then is fact or actuality. It’s how nature works. This has nothing to do with feelings which only makes things muddy when we start to say something shouldn’t have happened or that it should have happened.

This really is separating our thoughts about a situation which in turn become feelings or emotions and viewing the situation for what it is.

It is very difficult to accept this concept when it is the loss of someone be it a death or the breaking of a friendship. It is not easy to accept when you get fired, or don’t get the job you wanted or you get a flat tire or lose your wallet.

However on the flip side we feel happy and grateful when things “work out” or they seem to “fall into place”. The concept cannot work only one way. We cannot say the stars are lining up for us only when something that we label as GOOD is happening and then magically the stars are not aligned when BAD things are happening?

Can we alter or change things? Well, we cannot go back in time and as far as I know we don’t know the future so what exactly are we altering. But each decision always has its own set of consequences or outcomes.

It happened that way because it was supposed to happen that way. How do we know? Because that’s what happened. Our feelings may wish otherwise or they may justify our outcome because it was pleasant to us. Our thoughts or feelings do not dictate what IS though. And this is why the concept cannot just work one way, which would only be the way we want and when we want.

It’s two sides of the same coin that we hold. One is easier to accept but it does not negate the other and the truth of what IS.

Have you ever had a conversation with someone you don’t know that well and you find yourself being more of who you REALLY are. Maybe because you know there is no judgement since they know nothing about you. Maybe you feel like you can let your guard down or just be how you want to be seen.

This then brings up some interesting thoughts or ideas. There is how we see ourselves, how others see us and how we want to be seen. Differentiating between these points are important as they are not at all the same.

A few years ago I went to the Power Athlete Symposium. It was in Austin, Texas. I flew from Toronto, Canada by myself and arrived at the event by myself not knowing a single soul. It was an incredible weekend and I met some really amazing people. I was in the middle of the hardest year of my life when I attended and I could even say it was the lowest point of my life. I felt like shit, I was exhausted, but I left feeling connected to new people in just one short weekend.

I have kept in touch with a few other these people. One thing that I notice is that while I may have met them at a point where I felt the most down I was still able to paint my own picture to them. Was it false? No not really, but I know that I often feel comfortable with strangers because I don’t have to pretend to be anything or anyone that I don’t want to be. So I would say that I paint or present my true self. Or more accurately I am able to be open and be how I want to be seen.

How we see ourselves is a bit like muddy water because I think it gets dirtied by the fact that we are making a story up of how we think others see us which then makes us see ourselves in an altered way. How others see us may not always be shared to us so it quite possibly could remain an unknown. And then how we want to be seen is, in my opinion difficult with people that have known us the longest because they are not always willing to see the growth, changes or new versions of ourselves. Sometimes they still see us as the old versions whereas a new person is seeing the HOW we want to be seen because we really don’t risk the judgement from them.

Today I was chatting with one of the guys that I met. He and his wife are expecting a baby so I was asking how is wife is feeling and when the baby is due. During our conversation I mentioned that I have been doing more writing and he commented that he didn’t know I liked writing. On one hand, how could he know when most of what we have in common is gym stuff, working out and coaching. On the other hand it was funny that I have no problem telling him that I have committed to writing a blog post every day for a year – yet am reluctant to share it with those in my daily life.

I don’t have a logical explanation for this other than I feel less inclined to share what I’m doing when I think someone isn’t that interested. I also am not seeking approval. I could say that this has probably always been an undiscovered passion and as I step into this new version of myself I suppose that I am aware not everyone will get it.

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment”.

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

This past week in a group chat we agreed to post pictures of the sky or our view at different times of the day. three or four people from the group live in British Columbia so their pictures were of mountains and sunsets, mountains and water with evergreen trees lining the water and beautiful night skies where you could actually SEE the stars!

I, on the other hand live in Ontario. The southern most part of the province which is very flat and I often joke that you can watch your dog run away for weeks. Sure I could drive 20 – 30 minutes to see some water but that is not the same as those who live right on the water.

But an interesting point was made. On one hand I can see why people who leave Ontario for BC never come back because if its beauty. The sunsetting behind the mountains and reflecting on the lake is amazing. However once the sun sinks below the lowest point of the mountain (which is not near ground level) they do not get to watch the sun sink until it disappears to the other side of the world. So on the other hand living in flat places also has different or unique aspects as well that I didn’t think of before. I can easily look out my back porch and watch the sun set. The only obstacle in the way is the fence at the back of the yard. Ultimately that certainly does extend the length of viewing time.

So perhaps the lesson is that we can truly find beauty everywhere if we just pause to be grateful for where we are NOW instead of wishing we were somewhere else.

Be right here, right now.

~ Unknown

A few months ago a few of us in a Mentorship Group took turns giving challenges to the others. When it was Kyle’s turn he created different journal prompts for each day as well as a few other things to try adding to your day like apple cider vinegar first thing in the morning.

One of the journal prompts that stuck out the most to me was, Introduce Yourself to Yourself. This felt pretty hard to write about myself but of course I did it.

Today I was reminded of this exercise and I encourage you to try the same thing. But, as I thought about this today I now could add to the exercise by adding a few other questions or prompts…

Think of a time when you weren’t showing up for yourself. If you could see that other what would you say to help that version of yourself?

Think of a time when you were struggling or perhaps you weren’t able to acknowledge all the great things you were doing. What would you say to that version of yourself?

Healing from situations looks like many different things, has many layers and its never the same for two people. This comes as an important reminder then to be patient and extend yourself the same amount of love you would give someone else.

If you are feeling stuck with a situation or story that seems to linger take some time to ask yourself and answer these three questions. It doesn’t have to be all at once. Take some time to reflect upon what you would say to a friend and then see if you can show up for yourself and do the same.

Be still. The quieter you become, the more you can hear.

~ Ram Dass

O Canada! Our home and native land.

True patriot love, in all thy sons command.

With glowing hearts, we see thee rise

The true north strong and free!

From far and wide, O Canada

We stand on guard for thee

God keep our land, glorious and free

O Canada, we stand on guard for Thee!

O Canada!

We Stand On Guard For Thee

Big things happening in Canada today. Yesterday felt heavy and today feels like finished the day strong and on a positive note. I pray that things continue to remain peaceful.

Having connections is so important. I don’t mean just all the people in your life. Because while you may be connected to them having connections is another level.

I do a one on one mentorship program with someone. His name is Brian. Through Brian I am now connected to a group and we meet virtually every two weeks. This group offers us a safe place to share, be vulnerable and talk about things that we observe about ourselves, others, along with our struggles.

It is a unique dynamic. And it is really amazing to be able to create relationships and feel a connection with people you haven’t met in person. On our last call, the importance of have this kind of support became even more apparent for me for a few reasons.

First, I tend to be somewhat private or secretive (so my dad tells me) but it’s not because I’m hiding anything. It really comes down to the fact that I don’t feel like sharing plans if my intuition tells me the idea will not be understood or poo poohed. I also don’t see the need in asking for directions from people who don’t know how to get where I want to go. I suppose this doesn’t necessarily mean I have to keep so quiet but in the end I don’t feel like many spaces are open enough for me to speak or share freely, so I don’t.

The second reason is that I often find myself in a position of listening and/or giving advice or guidance to others. So when I am constantly giving I have sometimes found myself a bit alone because there’s not always someone there for me.

Knowing who your support team or group or friend is super important. It’s important to be able to talk, vent, or work through ideas and it’s also equally beneficial to have someone who can listen without judgement but also offer different points of view or ideas that add value to you. Overall this leads to not only better relationships but also personal growth as you give and receive with others.

Depth of friendship does not depend on length of acquaintance

~ Rabindranath Taqore