For almost two years I have immersed myself in a mentorship program. In some ways it could be described as counselling. It is not counselling. It is looking at ones behaviours and patterns while learning to connect to our own physiology. Breathwork is part of this and I choose to follow physical training that is offered as well. Each call is different in terms of what I want to talk about or what I am currently unravelling and trying to understand.

Besides this one on one mentorship I am also a participant in a group whom have also done the same thing. These two experiences combined are pretty incredible and potent yet are two different dynamics. The success of the group, or perhaps I should say that in order to get the most out of the group aspect you have to be willing to open up and share. This is not easy. Sometimes it’s really hard to be vulnerable with a group of strangers. On the other hand the fact that they are strangers makes it easier to crack the door open because you know they are there to do the same. Through virtual sharing connections are made.

The one on one is also a shared experience by both of us and it is for me anyhow built completely on trust and a willingness to expose myself. During my call today I realized just how much I was actually choosing to put myself in these potentially uncomfortable situations to learn and grow.

Not everyone is going to jump into this type discomfort for the sake of growth. I get it. There are however so many ways in which we can challenge ourselves daily. This can be in the form of exercise, trying new recipes that test our skills, it can be reading every day, learning a language or new hobby. It can also be trying to create a new habit or make an effort to change a behaviour or pattern that we see. When we bring awareness to what we are doing I think it’s important to acknowledge what we are doing or how far we have come with results or changes.

It becomes easy to keep chasing the next thing and not pause long enough to realize that what we have accomplished is probably pretty damn cool.

Not until we are lost do we begin to understand ourselves ~ Henry David Thoreau

The more I think about the perfect day the more I think there needs to be more elaboration. Yesterday I talked about not just focusing on the location or conjuring up some dream without taking action. I get it that we can all come up with things which we could list off as our perfect day. But is it remotely realistic? Is what you actually want?

It seems to me that as adults a fair amount of us end up spending an awful lot of time doing things we don’t enjoy or even want to be doing at all. So how does that happen? How do we get so far off track that one day we realize we are not even living a life we like?

I don’t really have an answer to that. But my guess is that we as we become older and get further away from childhood we lose who we really are and we work at becoming or maintaining a persona to please other people. We may actually like the school courses we take, or aspects of a job, and there can truly be many wonderful things to be grateful in our lives.

But what if instead of imagining the perfect day as some far off dream or unattainable goal we made it happen every day. Why not reevaluate our typical day to day activities and ask ourselves where were could make some small or even large adjustments. While there may be a number of things out of our control, what IS within our control? Making a few small tweaks to our lives could just be the tinder we need to create more action and inspiration. And if a few small tweaks are easy to maintain then they quickly will become habits. Which in turn we likely will be looking for other ways to make small improvements to our day.

Take a look at your day. Is there anything you would like to add or omit to your morning to get your day started? Are you able to set some time for yourself during the day? What about before bed, what does this routine look like? A successful bedtime leads to a better morning.

I challenge you to find at least three things that you would like to add or omit from your day so that you can create a better day for yourself.

Those who don’t believe in magic will never find it ~ Roald Dahl

I remember that in a course I took one of the questions was to describe your perfect day. Waking up to a view of the sun coming over the palm trees and ocean or watching the sunset in the mountains may sound ideal. But is it realistic? I don’t live near any water and its so flat you can watch your dog run away for weeks. So how do we then create our perfect day?

I think it’s okay and acceptable to have something in mind that doesn’t quite exist – YET.

A few weeks ago I commented on someone’s IG story about how beautiful the numerous pictures of evergreens covered in snow were. His response was, “Time to push the move button”.

This got me thinking…about that perfect day or perhaps its really about creating the life I want to be living. While I do not live in a mountainous region right now there’s nothing wrong with wanting that as part of my perfect day. Maybe as new opportunities present themselves and life continues to unfold this is something that I can work towards. Perhaps a move is part of my future story.

But this certainly cannot detract from where I am now. So there’s a difference in how this question is answered. If you’re answering it thoughtfully as though you have created the life you want or are working on it that’s one thing. However if you’re answering the question from a place of frustration and wanting to escape your current life then its just a dream with no plan.

The other side of this is also being realistic about where you are NOW. There is more than just one aspect that would make the perfect day. So while location or view might be one it’s important to spend time on the other key components to this. Let’s take out of the equation any other people that might be involved and right now just focus on YOU & ME. If we’re not living where we want how can we get there? And while we are working at making steps in a new direction is it not possible to have perfect days where we are currently living?

Instead of creating a perfect day for one day let’s find ways to make our right now have perfect days. What would make morning be the best? How about bedtime? Wherever we live there will always be memories which can only be unique to that setting or place in time. So while its great to dream and make a plan to create the life you want, remember that you life has already started. It’s up to us to live it fully.

Life is what happens while you are making other plans ~ John Lennon ~

I love the quote that says, Life must be lived looking forward but can be only understood by looking back. It seems like most people (myself included) can have a difficult time when we find ourselves in the middle or a tremendously hard situation. While we are trying to navigate the shit show or deal with changes, grief, loss etc it’s unlikely that we have the capacity to look at our own situation and either find the good or remind ourselves that this will be a great lesson down the road.

Let’s face it, if you can think of one or two BIG life situations that you have navigated, then you know exactly what I am talking about. Often the best case scenario is moving just getting ourselves through the situation as best as possible. When we do come out the other side, I wonder though how many of us take the time to reflect on what just happened, what we dealt with, how we felt and what we learned. Are there any gifts or blessings that came from that hard time?

We continue to move forward. Which I am completely supportive of looking ahead instead of behind. But sometimes it’s much needed to acknowledge what we have done and how that changed us or created the life or situation we have now. I suppose the most challenging aspect of doing this is taking full accountability for our own actions, choices, decisions and finding acceptance or gratitude where we presently find ourselves.

Take a moment and look at your life. Everything that is present now is a result of past experiences. We can label these as good or bad but the fact of the matter is that they are done. We can look back at them but we can only live going forward. Imagine you are the main character in a movie and you keep reliving the same day or experience over and over and over….until you have learned what you need to know to change the situation.

What if you started doing this now? You can wake up tomorrow and the next tomorrow doing something different each day until you come up with the result you are looking for. Who knows what else we may find by changing or altering our outlook even the tiniest bit.

Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall ~ Confucius ~

Of course when the idea of writing every single day wandered into my mind it was met with a slight bit of doubt. Would I stick with it and more importantly what would I write every day? I didn’t plan this out over weeks and collect a long list if topics and ideas. This couldn’t possibly be more off the cuff or spontaneous for me.

But let’s be real for a second. Sometimes there just comes a point and you know you have to be real with yourself and make the extra effort to make something happen. It’s easy to get caught up in so many excuses as to why something won’t work. Or oh! even better how you would be more successful or feel more inspired if you lived somewhere else. In the end, this is of course just bullshit.

There are people all over the world doing some pretty cool and even extraordinary things. And all these people live in all kinds of different places. They don’t become successful because they had the most inspiring house or apartment, view or any other “thing” which made creating easier. Some of these people don’t even have all the schooling, or courses or years of experience as another person but the difference for those who succeed are those who are taking action. They are just doing IT.

Instead of being caught in a loop of what if’s or if only’s I remembered a line that my mentor told me….Everywhere you go, there you are. Bingo. If you are unable to get started right where you are in this exact moment then how can you be better somewhere else? You will still be there. Just like YOU are wherever you are right now.

So today the reflection is coming back to that line. Everywhere I go, there I am. If I cannot give to myself or make a commitment and be reliable to ME, then what do I really have to give others?

As the year closed out I, like many people I’m sure did a lot of reflecting…

Reflecting on the past and where I am headed for 2022. In some ways the last two years have felt like the worst however they have allowed me to take the time to reset without feeling like I am being judged or pressured to move into my next thing.

I don’t know EXACTLY what my next thing will be. And while that could seem like a problem I have resolved not to spend time worrying about HOW things will fall into place. Rather the focus needs to be taking action on the changes I want to see and the life I want to create. If nothing changes then nothing will change.

I have made my list of intentions for this upcoming year. In order for anything to happen or slowly change I need to take action. This sort of builds off of my last post about motivation. We know its not sustainable for motivation to hang around every day all day but continually taking action will always bring us back to momentum which in turn will lead us to motivation.

In order for me to see any type of shift or change I have decided to write a blog every single day (unless I am travelling with no wifi or sick in bed) until my next birthday, January 14 2023. In the very least nothing comes out of this experiment other than accumulating a collection of posts and practicing writing. BUT, what about at the very most? What may come out of writing and posting every day?….

I challenge you to try your own version of this experiment. Can you pick ONE thing and do it every day for a year to see what kind of change comes about? I am interested to see how this grows on its own but I have a feeling that there will be a ripple effect into other areas as well.

Time will tell…..

Don’t judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds you plant ~ Robert Louis Stevenson